The Methuselarity Transformation by Rick Moskovitz

Author:Rick Moskovitz
Language: eng
Format: azw3, epub
Tags: Science Fiction
Published: 2014-04-22T04:00:00+00:00

When Ray showed up at Dr. Jensen’s office for his next session, he looked disheveled and haggard. There were dark circles under his bloodshot eyes. His feet shuffled as he entered the room. When he plopped down in the overstuffed chair, he looked as though he hadn’t slept in a week. The doctor looked him up and down, wondering if he would be up to the challenge that she was about to present.

“Tough week,” observed the doctor.

“The worst. I’ve hardly slept and when I have, I wished I’d stayed awake. The nightmares just kept coming. I’ve spent most of the past week in my dreams as a thirteen-year-old. I can still hear the sirens.”

“Perhaps we can put an end to the nightmares. Do you feel up to working today?”

“I guess so. Doesn’t seem like I have much choice. How much worse can things get?”

“I’d like to address your childhood memory with Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, or EMDR, a technique developed toward the end of the last century for treating trauma. We’ll start with a series of questions. Once we’re done with that part of the protocol, I’ll ask you to visualize aspects of the memory and to be in touch with the pain. That’s the hard part. While you’re imaging the scene, I’ll ask you to track my hand with your eyes as I pass it back and forth.”

“Then what happens?”

“We’ll stop the eye movements from time to time and sample whatever is in your awareness. Then we’ll focus on that and resume the eye movements.”

“So how will that help?”

“The eye movements help to reorganize how your brain processes and interprets the memory. Usually the end result is that the pain diminishes or goes away altogether.”

“And the memory?”

“May persist, but without the same emotional intensity, or it can fade,” said the doctor.

“What if I don’t want it to fade away? What if I need the pain? It’s defined me for most of my life. Maybe I’m not supposed to forget.”

“Perhaps. But the process tends to respect your inner wisdom. If part of you needs to remember, then you will. And if part of you still needs to suffer...well, then, that may still go on as well. You’ll need to have faith that it will unfold however it’s supposed to.”

“OK. What happens now?”

“I want you to imagine the scene you described last time and identify the worst part of it.”

“That’s easy. Being held back by the fireman and seeing her charred body being wheeled out.”

“What emotion is most connected with that image?” asked the doctor.

“Horror…utter horror.”

“Where in your body do you feel the horror?”

“In the back of my throat...and in the pit of my stomach.”

“And the intensity of the feeling on a scale from one to ten?”

“Twelve! It’s the worst feeling I’ve ever had.”

“OK. Now as you picture the scene and feel this emotion in the back of your throat and in the pit of your stomach, what present day belief about yourself is connected with it?”

“I’m a menace. I bring death wherever I go and I don’t deserve to live.

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